Bitter End

Brown, J. (2011). Bitter end. New York: Little, Brown. Seventeen year-old Alex has never had a boyfriend before, and when Cole, the handsome jock who has just transferred to her school, seems attracted to her, she is thrilled although somewhat surprised. Everything about their budding romance seems perfect, and she can't believe that he has chosen her and that he "gets" her. He understands her personality quirks and her poetry. He even understands her need to go to Colorado because her mother was on her way there when she died. Yes, things are almost too good to be true. Now, if only Cole weren't so jealous of her relationship with her two best friends, Bethany and Zack. Still, Alex tells herself that it's normal for a boyfriend to want to keep her to himself. What guy wouldn't be concerned about his girlfriend spending lots of time with another guy? To complicate matters, Bethany and Zack aren't all that enamored with Cole, and Alex starts feeling that she has to choose. Even Georgia, her boss at The Bread Bowl, seems to feel that the couple is moving too fast and becoming close too quickly. The time for playing it safe is over for Alex, and she is determined to take risks with the man in her life. Cole helps her feel protected and loved--and she never wants to lose that feeling of safety that he provides.

Cole's mask of perfection slips, though, as he becomes increasingly fearful of losing the hold he has on Alex. First, it starts with subtle verbal putdowns and looks that are hard to read. Then, inevitably, there are pinches, pushes, and punches. Still, Alex is sure that together they can fix things; certainly, all relationships have rocky points. If she can only figure out what she is doing to trigger his rage, then she can avoid it and defuse the situation. Alex hides the bruises and her fears. She also hides the truth from everyone around her since she knows they wouldn't understand. After all, she simply can't lose Cole, can she? What else does she have going for her? And he is so sorry whenever his temper gets the best of him--even covering her car with roses and promising to get therapy for his anger management issues. For the good moments and the feelings of love they share, Alex hangs on--until she no longer can hang on without giving up more of herself than she can afford.

Alex's difficulties in simply walking away from Cole even while sacrificing parts of herself are described clearly in this important novel by Brown, who wrote the impressive Hate List last year. She makes it clear that often leaving is much harder than staying, and that only the person inside the relationship with an abuser is able to understand what he/she is experiencing. It's impossible to know what you would do in such a situation. Give this title to all the teens in your life.

Favorite Lines: "He stood up, coming around the table and getting so close to me, our noses were practically touching. I could smell the gum on his breath. He stared at me, and whatver thoughts were in his head made his eyes grow darker. The smile had gone and been replaced by a snarl. I didn't think it was possible, but he gripped me even more fiercely. I felt something inside my wrist thump and strain. I sucked in air through my teeth, my knees buckling even further. There was nothing I could do about the tears now, and I blinked them away angrily" (p. 193).